Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
