I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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