I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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