the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
