Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize