The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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