yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
