I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
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