I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
