When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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