I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize