i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
