My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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