you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
