Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Randomize