I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
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