i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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