youre lurking in front of me
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
