Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
