She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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