He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
