i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
