you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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