will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
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