The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
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it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
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I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
FUCK WHALES
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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