The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
