Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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