Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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