wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
