I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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