i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal