I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize