he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
