Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
