apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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