would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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