after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize