Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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