The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
false alarm. still invincible.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
