Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize