I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Randomize
