do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
