I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Randomize
