you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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