i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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