ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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