fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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