In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Mom said you looked used
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize