i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Randomize
