My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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