whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
